Those Aren’t Gun Shots, it’s Just Me.

My husband drives a Mazda 626,

I drive a Ford Explorer.

(those are not really our cars, Bryan’s looks much worse)

I make Bryan take my truck to work (as sad as it sounds, I would rather he get into an accident then me AND the kids)and I take his Mazda. It’s not that simple though. While Bryan’s car does do better in the snow, it also has many other problems with it.  It has a clogged Catalytic Converter which can basically be translated into “car is really loud”, it sounds  like there is a fart can on the tail end of the car (only not as clean sounding as that video).

I have come to terms with all the noise that this car makes, and it’s look, and the passerbys staring in horror, again, safety over beauty. So I get in the car yesterday to go to the store, it had just started snowing pretty hard and traffic was moving slow, only this time there is something different with the car and the noises that are escaping out of its behind. It was bogging down really bad and struggling hard when I pushed on the gas, causing it to be even louder than it already was. To add to my complete and utter embarrassment, it starts backfiring like crazy, and loud too, making it now sound as though several rounds have been shot. I am driving by a neighborhood and I can only imagine what all the poor people sitting inside of their houses must be thinking.

So today, we had to go to the store and I had explained to my husband all the noises it was making, how I was really scared, and how he is going to be shocked by these new issues with his car. I packed us blankets and water, food, and hot hands, because I was just sure we wouldn’t be making it far. Bryan drove there and the whole time I am just waiting for the car to do all the things I had mentioned…..nothing. We get to our first destination and still nothing. Go to our next destination, and still nothing. The damn car was fine the whole time! Bryan said that it doesn’t like the cold and it could sense my anxiety, and was relieved that he was now doing the driving…yeah, whatever.

I somehow always manage to sound as though I am lying my ass off every time something like this happens.

We’re so cool.

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